Let Me Take You Out Of Your Misery (A Sunday Special)


My dear mermaid hearts, 

I've become quite the wee little mouse. Ever so quiet as if I am burrowing deep within my chipmunk's nest. Not for nothing, I have taken this respite from being an enigma to gather up discernings about myself, take inventory of my environment, close out chapters and cycles that no longer serve me and position my objectives for my vocation. To be a mother and housewife is the most valuable and extraordinary job of all. It can be a turnabout once leaving part of those employments behind and becoming an empty nester. In the last five years, I've been genuinely focused on my career bidding and manifesting my life's purpose with enormous discipline and vigour. It's now an engrained detail within me that if we as women are to accomplish anything significant
for ourselves, we must be the maker of execution. 

My dear mama and I can not or choose not to hold the notion of conversation about a man's money, a woman's money and when and if it's both. We do not acquiesce one wit. But, a fortnight ago, I heard something quite comical, which holds some truth. Women believe her money is hers solely; his money is hers, and their money is hers too. It's witty because it's true.

I am so appreciative that my husband is masculine. From research and talking to thousands of women over the years (when I had a significant YouTube audience), I know that most women adore having a masculine man by their side. One of the commonalities that nearly all of the women agreed on was that if a man was highly emotional, soft, and a bit feminine, he became incredibly unappealing, and her respect for him went out with the baby's bath water. Whereas if the man is held in high esteem, takes extra care of her safety and protection, and keeps her guessing, this is what women love. I must agree. If I do not respect a man, you can forget it, my dear. I believe if men were asked this question, they would also agree. I am highly passionate about teaching women to become very strong in their self-belief. When a woman becomes deeply secure within (and I do not mean having money and a career, for many women can possess quid and still be deeply insecure), she can remain firm in her expectations. This confidence will draw in the same energetic man and find a harmonious balance. The equal facility of a man and woman acquiescing in their roles together is quite beautiful. 

I raised all my children with proper skills, healthy minds, and the ability to be self-sufficient as able body adults. After bringing them up, my attention turned to my pining for my unfulfilled childhood dream of being an author, artist and farmer living an old-fashioned life. I placed my passions on the back burner to be a stay-at-home mother and support my then-husband.

Yet, after I became an empty nester, my then-mate was unwilling to compromise for me to pursue my dream. I am internally at peace as I have done the interior work on myself. My ex-mate bestowed me a great gift to reignite my long-laid-dormant inner strength to decide for myself, and I served him with a bill of divorce. (Mind you, my fruits, be not blinkered in concluding my career dreams was the straw that broke the camel's back.) I had dealt with such long past nonsense on stilts, and it took me years to love myself more than another. I ultimately arose to the acceptance; there was never a truth of which he spoke to me that didn't hurt. I have long categorised him as an encounter that was a proficient learning experience that will assist in my enabling to teach women and children to never falter on themselves for another. There is no peace to be found if one does so. These days I am quite indifferent. I do not hate, love, nor have any accounts that ignite emotion within me except to teach self-love and the importance of leaning upon self.

I ignored my true inner being repeatedly from day one, deeply knowing our union was an experience that should never have transpired. Yet, I will not carry on in sharing my circumstances, for it is of no benefit of which to derive the telling. Do you know when you no longer hold anger or feelings towards someone? When you can not conjure up a memory where there's no emotion, as if the whole experience never even took place, that is when a person has definitively healed. (You'll want to read my autobiography this year for the details if you please). No, seriously, though, the only reason to share my story is to show women that although offences get laid against an individual, there is always a positive and incredible way to come through the other side without leaving manners, grace and dignity at the back gate. It is not so effortless at times, yet the emotional and universal reward is entirely worth it. (To be frank, I think this was the greatest offender in the Tom Brady and Gisele Bündchen marriage fallout. I read her book years ago and picked up on several of her self-concept insecurities, which is why I have gained that conclusion.) That is my subjective contextual opinion, albeit we as women (or men) should never put off our desires for the outset because what happens; is a breeding ground of deep resentment. We all should remain selfish because we will ultimately arrive there at the end of play anyhow. We will always make decisions for our personal happiness; make no mistake about it. May we make haste in not wasting time and simply manage to get on with it.

All is lost when a man feels disrespected. He will stick around because men are entirely more committed than women in that way, yet they will detach emotionally from the wife/woman. If a man feels disrespected, all is lost. I am quite old-fashioned in my clothing and have considerable notions about motherhood, being a housewife and the like. I am also very antiquated in that I respect the man for being masculine, the provider, keeping me safe and all things that make for being a man. I am not a woman of feminism; however, I do not judge anyone for their beliefs. If anyone knows me, I fully believe everyone has the right to believe anything they so choose. I attempt to seek out the best in everyone, and at times, that has stretched me, but as time prevails, it has become second nature. What comes with accepting folks is not that we like what they represent; or even like the person. It is the mere truth that we usually find so unbearable in another person because we possess that same imperfection, and looking at that other person has unearthed our unresolved pain. For example, when we become unhinged in anger, that person is touching on our hidden wound. This flare-up can be instrumental as an anecdotal tonic if we can rise above the town square and view it retrospectively. Remember, my dear heart; optimism is my one weakness. (wink wink)

May one not inquire what this post is meant to obtain, for I know not, and might we leave it at that. Some blog posts do not have to be erudite. Did you lose the plot, my basketeers? Speculation is the enemy of calm, now carry on. (You know I'm having a go with you. Smile.) Have a happy day, my darlings. Cheers! 

Most affably yours til my next swim, Lady Raquelxxx


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