Rachel Hollis: Girl, Tell the Truth! {Actually, You Did See This Coming}
I am going to catch Rachel Hollis out, just as I did in my last post. You, my dear friends, know that I take the holistic approach to everything that occurs in my life; this topic is no different. I believe that when someone causes my thoughts to whip into agitation, my process of uncovering the flowing of my thoughts, {so that they don't transpire into subconscious beliefs} I do my best to make sense of it. To unravel my emotions encourages my growth by becoming a more beautiful human being. I intend for this to create a mustering in your thoughts when reading this post so that you will glean some understanding into your own life as well. For whence, we understand other humans as well as ourselves we are less inclined to be hateful and unkind.
" I firmly believe that genuinely caring about someone/folks means knowing when tough love is necessary. I've always thought that those who care about your well being the most are the ones who won't hesitate to run foot em'."
I am taking Rachel to the task. From one woman to another someone needs to do it, since no one else seems to be giving her sound advice from her neck of the woods. If the task of hiring and sacking lay with me, I would have cleaned house in Rachel's camp. I write this post with all love that I have for supporting and loving women, Rachel included {I've come a long way, friends.} When I heard Rachel speak of 'grief', it caused a trigger for me. However, not much of one because I know why it triggered me {'grief' and losing my dear puppet, and I still haven't written much about it publically, and it's been a bit over a year}. So I thought coming from her and speaking of grief so soon was a bit rich. The timing is ill-suited. I do not believe regardless of how strong a person is {in which I know that I am, having lost a child to murder} can foresee an entire book of grief, about death and divorce in a matter of six weeks and claim to be a teacher. Life teaches us first, and then we teach, not the reverse.
Furthermore, these are two entirely different beasts. Trust me, I know. I have experienced both nearly simultaneously. Honestly, Rachel has no idea {as of yet} about the grief process, of divorce much less six weeks after announcing her split when she claims her feelings of wanting to divorce has been ongoing for over three years. So basically right around the time she was thinking about divorce is when she was adopting her daughter Noah and selling loads of seminars about how to have a fabulous marriage. The timetable is off. Suppose she wanted to write a book, fine, but give it a minute. Honestly, a writers mode of operation is always to write, so I do understand and show her that right of passage. We write when things are happening, through and after. However, there is a gestation period in all matters of life. You wouldn't become impregnated and immediately the next day want to birth the child, nor would you plant a garden and expect the next day to eat your crop of corn. You know there is a process, and that's a beautiful thing if you are comfortable with the affairs of your voyage.
She has lumped her entire book together as if it's a pot of "everything but the kitchen sink" soup. Life is not like that at all. If she were to have said her book was about how she dealt with her brother's suicide {when, she was a young girl}, that would have been understandable. I feel as though to get another bestseller; she threw this book together because her agent advised her to strike while the irons still hot. Rachel should not listen to what everyone is telling her. If following her gut, which she said in an interview that she didn't think the timing was right, for the book, she most assuredly should have listened and followed. She ignored her heart, buckled under fear and let her team run the decision. Life will have to teach her a few hard lessons. It would be best if she pulled that book, no matter the cost because, in the extended scheme of things, the amount of displeasure she'll reap {which I think has already begun} will be a hard lesson to learn, long last. {That being said, perhaps her next book can be all about following her heart and the catastrophe of what occurs when listening to others. You're welcome to use this idea. Err...}
I've always said life teaches and words do not, and so shall it be. I watched her interview and immediately I could tell she held a bit of nervousness. It might not be for some to have noticed, but I could sense her energy on screen. She most likely will only do the interviews such as Good Morning America because no one will catch her out, and they are one of a few media outlets that don't swing into controversy. GMA is much like People magazine. They try to keep an image clean and suitably diplomatic.
Who on Rachel's team missed the necklace she's wearing on her book cover that says "Not Sorry"? It's distasteful. That slip up was another reason in which I gathered there was no thought put into the new cover. The first cover was creative; the second and third were rubbage. Anyone that would encourage her to sell a book at such an inopportune time is revolting. It always happens when you give a little power to people; it goes to their heads like strong drink.
If she doesn't take a step back from the limelight, she will be chewed up and spit out, sooner more so than later. Honestly, she is following in her father and grandfather's footsteps with her approach to teaching. She strives to push through an entrenched mindset of the woman in the household treated as less than the male figures in her life, so she pushes {her audience with force, fear and bullying} without realising she's creating detriment to others and herself. She left home which was in a small town to make it big, to overcompensate for feeling less than/unworthy in a male-dominated world. So to make herself feel of worth, she hooked onto Dave out of insecurity. By golly, I understand that as well, I did similarly. I went from one dysfunctional 'father figure' to another by marrying someone that was me pushed out. {If you'd like to know what 'me pushed out' means watch this video}. We can run all we'd like, but still, we end up with the same situations. Another face another place, but we can't run from ourselves. Rachel seems to have attempted to replace the father figure in her life with Dave and then realised she was still unhappy. Or perhaps she held onto the marriage as long as she needed to so she could get a financial footing and feel a bit more secure to take care of herself when she knowingly decided to leave. We can't be happy in another; we must be happy with ourselves first. {Wait, isn't this exactly what her books supposedly entail?} When someone places too much emphasis on their marriage, children etc. it's never going to end well. I don't care what anyone says when you put everyone and everything before yourself, you have already gambled and lost. Real-life isn't an Instagram post. I didn't brush my teeth, or bathe for days nor get out of my pyjamas when I was working through my son's death. Yet on Rachel's YouTube channel, she chastised {mocked} folks {women} for 'just' getting up out of bed and breathing as if that was a trivial and ridiculous notion and nothing to be proud of accomplishing. She behaves this way because she lacks understanding and is entirely misinformed and uneducated. She is still using misaligned beliefs from her upbringing as a way to feel significant in the world by using works and receiving accolades. She has the belief that selling books and having a successful career, means she'll finally feel significant. She honestly has not an ounce of understanding in the mental health aspect of the many things she speaks about. It would be best if she took some time to think and evaluate the actions in her own life before trying to teach others. No one is going to believe a word she says anymore if she continues to be extraordinarily out of touch with her main demographic {religious women}. She speaks as if she's the mouthpiece for grief and struggle when she doesn't know the truth of struggle, yet. She is so out of alignment with this book. It may garner some success from the standpoint of a well-oiled machine, but we know what happens to the goose that lays the golden egg, not in a trice. She must change her mindset, and if she doesn't, she'll eventually lose all trust with folks/women, and they will never return as loyal fans. It's probably been quite disappointing to her avid fans and for the many thousands of women that look up to her, and it's quite clear she is no longer as trustworthy. It's rather disingenuine, and I think others feel her inauthenticity. She falls into the category of how being raised in religion, creates a delusional idea of perfectionism. A massively flawed idea, that to be loved we must be perfect. Well, I have an announcement for everyone. We are ALL perfect already. We always have been and always will be forever and ever. Attempting to paint a perfect life will cause more harm than good. There is no happy end to that type of thinking. It's terribly awful to make women believe that there is some kind of works {be a certain weight, look a certain way, carry a certain handbag, or sell MLM products} that must be accomplished to receive love finally. No! She should not be teaching any self-help at all. Her self concept is completely flawed and backwards. She/ We ALL ARE God Consciousness realised NOW in this very moment. We are all worthy NOW, and not in some moment in the far beyond once we accomplish a tally list through works and goals. Goals are also flawed. And while I'm at it, so is patience. Patience is what someone tells you when they have taken a long time to accomplish their dreams. So they go about telling everyone it takes patience. No. That's absolutely not true. There is nothing to patience except the flawed limiting belief that folks tell themselves they have to 'earn' something. I'm really taking that to an extreme too and with good measure. I'm rather fed up with folks {influencers/podcasters/authors/entrepenuers} trying to tell us as women that we have to make some mark on the chart to be significant, and it's rubbage. Do not ever believe a word of that when someone starts trying to sell you that hogwash bill of goods. Tell them to put a sock in it. Because almost anyone out there that is an entrepreneur says all kinds of malarky about patience, working hard and goals. They are limited in their beliefs. Full stop! They don't know what in tarnation they're talking about.
In long, Rachel still has some flawed conditioning beliefs according to how her folks raised her. She's teaching women a harmful approach to what she thinks is self-love, self-concept, and acceptance. How does Rachel expect to teach women a healthy self-concept when hers is still drastically flawed? She can't, not accurately anyway. She'll come round to realising what I'm speaking is an absolute truth. Most often it only takes a small portion of looking in the mirror and lovingly seeing ourself with honesty, transparency and love most importantly. But for reasons I just described is why Rachel hasn't learned yet, but she will. I trust all processes and know everything always works accordingly. We are all wonderful and beautiful in all the stages of our lives; we are all doing perfectly, now and always. Rachel has inspired me to continue on my path of being genuine and knowing that once again, this post has solidified the positive unconditional loving approach that I have for all women. I have no control over anyone but myself, however, you can bet your bottom dollar I will continue to influence women with love, boldness, self-acceptance and self-confidence from this day forward. I will always strive to be exactly the way I would expect others to be with me, and that is open, honest, fearless and all-encompassing in unconditional love. And like my mother has always told me, "Pay no mind to what others are doing for the cream will always rise to the top, my darling." And just as Lady Violet from Downton Abbey would say," And who can argue with that!"
For everyone reading this, I am writing with the intention that you swim away with a better understanding of yourself and others. So be it, so it is. And now I must love you and leave you. Happy Day!
Most affably yours til my next swim, Raquelxxx
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